NYC: Finding a Home for the HOLLA-DAYS
Current mood: good Category: Life
So, I didn't go to Vegas for Christmas. But, lemme tell you, I was still home for the holla-days. First, I need to preface this story with a little tidbit about my neighborhood. Or, shall I say, my HOOD, my home. I live in BedStuy (Bedford Stuyvesant). You know, Jay Z, the Marcy Projects? BedStuy. It's ghetto is what I'm saying. It's the hood. And it's been home for 4 months. And I don't have many complaints. The complaints I do have aren't really complaints, but observations. For instance, I have interesting neighbors. And by neighbors, I mean drug dealers. No, I'm not kidding. One neighbor likes to ride his bike alongside of me when I was walk to work. We became "friends" after he holla'd at me:
'Damn girl, you thick as hell'. ugh. thanks. "Bike guy," aka "ODB (Old Dirty Bastard)", offered to help me move out. "When are you moving out?" he asked "The first of the month" I reply "I can help you move" he says "With what? Your bike?" I challenge. "I have access to a van. I can make some calls"...of course you can. You sell drugs. This morning he was outside my house with a van. I went to work. But, ya I'm moving. In between Christmas and New Years I am switching homes. My uncle is helping me move and ODB won't have to help me with his crack van. Trevor and I just barely found a new place before he left. It was a ridiculous search. I can't even begin to explain to you the ridiculousness of finding an apartment in NYC. But I will. I began to explain before, but this time it was like hell. HELL. No, really though- HELL. We almost moved back to Vegas. On our budget, look at some of the apartments that brokers showed us:
I wish I was making this shit up Apparently for $1,800.00 a month you get bathrooms without mirrors, showers without tiles and bedrooms without walls.
After week one and 13 apartments we thought we had found dream apartment. We were wrong. This Broker motherfucker wanted to charge us 17% of a years rent on move in day (= $3,814.80) plus first ($1,870.00) and last month's rent ($1, 870.00), security deposit ($1,870.00) and application fee (= $150.00). oh.hell.no. So we lost perfect apartment with satan broker. And then we had aprox. 3 days to find a new perfect apartment. But, like I said, $1, 800.00 doesn't go very far. But- we found something. Yes. We did find something.
A real 2 bedroom with real hardwood floors, With exposed brick, on the FIRST floor of a building 3 blocks away from a subway in MANHATTAN
And it only took us 22 apartments and lying about our names and trying to cheat the system and it not working to succeed.
But, the previous dwellers were a homo and a white girl- so it bodes well for us. Oh ya- and its in Spanish Harlem. Whatever, you win some you loose some. And we have nothing in our apartment. Really. Between the two of us we have a bed. My bed. My amazing rhapsody bed. So, really feel free to send us some cheer. Or plates, or hangars, or alcohol. We are registered at Bed, Bath & Beyond.
After we got the apt. - we decided we needed to rest. We went to Passover with the Jews. It was a blast. It is sacrilegious to eat the chocolate Star of David?
Then after we had the keys of the new casa in hand we went to Long Island to hang out with the other Jews and so Trevor could head to LV and I could spend Christmas with them. And it was good times. My cousin and I made cookies while her 6yr. old went to her grandparents house.
Then she came home to decorate the cookies.
It was fun. The baby had a blast [if !supportLineBreakNewLine] [endif]We made soooo many friggen cookies. I AM a sugar crystal. No, really my blood has sugar running through it. So sweet.
On Christmas Eve the 6yr. old made us place settings for dinner.
This is the one she made for me:
I was like 'G, what is this?' 'It's a picture of me and you.' 'What are we doing?' 'I am crying and you are telling me to stop because you don't like it.' Damn straight. I can't hear you when you whine. Shut up. Ok, then we played up the Santa thing for the kids and had a grand ole time. I truly felt like I was home for the Holla-days.
Then, Merry Christmas, I moved into the new office.
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And I have a view of Brooklyn now. I brought in a plant and a pic of my mom too. I am right next to Rosie Perez (my HR lady) now. She calls everyone a cow, but I think she loves me cause she doesn't call me one. 'You better watch out you cow, Ima fuck you up.' (really) And now New Years, but that gets its own blog and the moving-ness does too. So- stay tuned for volume 2007 Xoxo Lor.
